I so identify with all of this except the diagnosis and people’s reaction to it still has me second guessing myself. What if the Doctor was wrong?

Autism and Expectations

Being an undiagnosed autistic has many challenges.

When you compare your reactions to things with other people’s, you feel like you’re getting it wrong. When other people take things in their stride, and your brain feels like it’s expanding inside your skull to the point you can’t think, then you feel like you’re overreacting.

And then there’s the gaslighting.

Gaslighting is a useful term, named after an old film where Ingrid Bergman is psychologically abused. Her abuser tells her that her memories are false, he questions her experience of her environment, he denies that things she remembers happening, have happened.

The result is that she ends up questioning her own perception of reality. She doubts her own memory. She doubts her sanity. She cannot trust that what she thinks is her lived experience is true.

Being an undiagnosed autistic can feel like the whole world is gaslighting you. From being…

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Being an undiagnosed autistic has many challenges.  When you compare your reactions to things with other people’s, you feel like you’re getting it wrong. When other people take thi…

Source: Gaslighting

416: How I would free my daughter with Aspergers



Everyday Asperger's

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How I would free my daughter with Aspergers

1. I would learn everything I could about the spectrum conditions through reputable, well-honored sources; and then readily forget everything I knew and recognize my daughter is a unique individual with exact perfection and a glorious light.

2. I would acknowledge each and every way my daughter’s actions reflect a behavior that in some way makes me believe that I am affected. What is it that she is doing that is causing discomfort to me, would be a question I would demolish, and whole-heartedly embrace the conclusion that I am the only one choosing to be in a state of discomfort based on someone else’s reactions and actions. And in truth my reactions have a direct effect on everyone about me. My ‘job’ as a parent, if I were to assign an exact ‘role’ and ‘duty,’ would be to reflect back…

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Aspergers Traits (Women, Females, Girls)


Everyday Asperger's

Ten Traits

1) We are deep philosophical thinkers and writers; gifted in the sense of our level of thinking. Perhaps poets, professors, authors, or avid readers of nonfictional genre. I don’t believe you can have Aspergers without being highly-intelligent by mainstream standards. Perhaps that is part of the issue at hand, the extreme intelligence leading to an over-active mind and high anxiety. We see things at multiple levels, including our own place in the world and our own thinking processes. We analyze our existence, the meaning of life, the meaning of everything continually. We are serious and matter-of-fact. Nothing is taken for granted, simplified, or easy. Everything is complex.

2) We are innocent, naive, and honest. Do we lie? Yes. Do we like to lie? No. Things that are hard for us to understand: manipulation, disloyalty, vindictive behavior, and retaliation. Are we easily fooled and conned, particularly before we…

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Do’s and Don’ts – negotiable (N) or not (NN)?



Here’s my list, in all it’s glory. It is highly possible and probable that some of the Do’s will be mirror opposites in the Don’ts, never mind, it’s ok to do that. Let’s get the non-beliefs out of the way. Oh I am open to discussing these at any point prior to posting the bigger individual post on each one. I have already covered A1 and B1, will be working on more shortly, in between random thoughts on other subjects or interests and I will add to the lists as I think about them.

A) I do not:believe:

  1. in god, a creator or the bible.
  2. in feminism. Feminism has kill male/female relationships
  3. that motherhood and careers can be combined successfully.
  4. there is anything wrong with same sex parenting

B) I do believe:

  1. sexuality is genetic or at least have an Epigenetic Key
  2. believe Aspergers/Autism is an evolutionary advancement not a disorder
  3. in male head of household relationships
  4. in the spirit world
  5. People are responsible for where they are in life. It is about choices.
  6. there are no rights and wrongs almost everything is perception.
  7. there is no such thing as a democracy, it is idealism and non-functional.
  8. the highest ranking people in the world are mostly the most corrupt.
  9. in life on other planets

I make bad decisions


I cant send you any encouragement I’m afraid. I am too much like you but I have learnt to dance in the rain.

Beer, Hugs and Ice Cream

I admit it.  I make bad decisions. I made another on last night.   

I am sure you are asking your self, “Loveshugs, why are you knowingly making bad decision?”

Well, my loves, there are many reasons why I do this to myself.

1. I have very little patience.

2. I am lonely.

3. I want attention. 

4. I want physical contact with a male. 

5. I want companionship.

6. I have very little patience. * i know. it is that important.

7. I believe i can protect myself. 

8. I can be selfish.

9. I am stubborn.

10. I am better at giving advice than following my own.


I can’t easily undo the bad decision. I will just have to live with it but next week, bad decisions need to stop.  STOP!    Feel free to send me encouragements about doing what is right!



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Female masturbation: the last sexual taboo


I believe that if you are unable to bring yourself to orgasm, how the hell can you expect your partner to. I believe most women fake orgasm. I think women, because they have never learnt to pleasure themselves, “fall in love”, get aroused but have no experience in achieving full sexual pleasure and they get frustrated and turn off sex or go to the next guy, fall in love, get aroused , same cycle. For your own sake, learn to pleasure your body, and do it often, it is very healthy .